We’re living in an age of which we are surrounded with so many “Couple goals” some might feel as though they need to be in a relationship to be relevant. Independence is a rare value nowadays. We should feel empowered by being able to stand for ourselves in a way that makes us feel happy and not as though we are missing something.
Standing for yourself might seem daunting and like something that you would want to avoid but the truth is, it is how we grow as the people we are. Just recently I have gotten out of the rutt that I have been in since as long as I can remember. Ever since I was a young girl I have been a hopeless romantic, wanting that picture perfect relationship and sad when I started thinking about reasons why I did not have it.
This is not me saying that you should not crave someone else in your life but I am saying that you do not need someone except for yourself. Focus on you and be happy with yourself. Take care of yourself and eventually someone will walk into your life because you have learnt to love yourself.
We spend so much time focusing on the way we look like, judging the way we look and pushing ourselves down. How many times have you walked past a mirror, stopped and started to inspect yourself? How many times have you started to stare att your imperfections as soon as you meet your reflexion?
There is this weird sense of having to check your whole being as soon as mirrors stare back at us. I’m not saying you should stay away from checking yourself out every now and again but I am telling you not to start picking at anything and everything that could be wrong with you. It’s slowly picking our self-esteem apart.
As soon as you have been away from your reflection for more than you are used to, the more you start to appreciate yourself and all the features that come with being you. It’s almost as though a new light shines and you start to reflect the way you feel deep inside to how you look.
Mirrors and thinking about the external takes away from the way we truly feel whether that has to do with how much we love ourselves or how we feel in general. I think we have to start shifting our focus and stop focusing on everything negative in our reflections and start tuning into our intuitions.
Goals are something that people want to reach. Whether that is in the long run or in the short run. It might seem impossible at first because as a human you have the tendency to overthink things. Constantly making things seem more complicated than they really are.
A key so simple that you might think of it as a joke, is what is going to lead you to your goal. Simply, take it one step at the time.
When we set a goal up for ourselves we want to be perfect on the first go, never setting small milestones for getting there.
If you want to make it a life long change you have to be able to make it a habit of yours, slowly making it a part of your life and you will reach your goal before you even notice it.
So, how do I do that?
Take your goal and take it apart. Divided it into smaller bitesize pieces that you can focus on one week at the time. If your goal is for example to lead a healthy life you might want to start with focusing on your portions one week and your training three times a week the next, bringing the habit you have created into the new week. And voila! You are on the way to reaching your goals.
Maybe it’s just me but I keep finding myself staling. Whether that is on school work or on other things. The fact is that with all the technology our generation has gotten their hands off it is getting easier and easier for us to not just procrastinate on work but also on life.
We get so consumed by how our lives look like that we forget to actually live our lives. Instead we focus on making everything seem much better than it is instead of actually making the best of our lives.
I will give you an example.
Whenever I seem to have the best time either with friends or with family I always seem to have a lot less pictures than when I am having an okay time. It’s like the fun just takes over and you don’t think about reaching across the other side of the room to reach for your phone.
Likewise when you are sitting at home staring at your books you know it’s a lot easier to reach over to your laptop to watch Netflix than to start on your paper or read a book of which could change your life.
I know it is a lot easier said than done but try to live a bit more. Learn, love, drown yourself in life because this is the only chance you have. You’ll never regret it.
Time and time again there is this point you might reach if you are anything like me. A point where you find yourself drooling over someone you have no idea about, but they seem so perfect, so your type.
You build these expectations in your head of how things could be if only we lived in an ideal world. The way they would touch your soul just the way they do in every movie ever made.
But it never ends up that way. Instead you sit there, staring and making up another daydream. Suddenly everything is perfect before you wake up in realization again. And it just feels like you are hurting yourself by doing it time after time.
It’s constant. You don’t know hoe to change it.
You are not alone. Just a half a dozen of everyone you know of has gone through the same thing. You just have to keep your eyes on yourself and your life. Just by the shift of focus you will find a new happiness and things will come to place.
Breathe. Nothing is un-fixable. There is always a plan for you no matter how hopeless you feel.